Dear Make-up Lady at Sephora,
Just wanted to let you know that I am not a cyclops. Apparently you thought I was, since you decided to give me dark smoky eye make-up but abandoned me after only doing one eye. I tried to clean myself up, but apparently you used the waterproof stuff. I got sympathetic looks from everyone in the mall since it looked like I'm in an abusive relationship.
Yep,
you suck.
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